


A Building of The Verse

by rustleofstars



Category: Pond (Australia Band), Tame Impala
Genre: Band Fic, Implied Sexual Content, Light Angst, M/M, Nonbinary Character, Slow Burn, Understanding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 02:04:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15132668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rustleofstars/pseuds/rustleofstars
Summary: "That’s not what I meant to say at allI mean-- I’m sick of meaning,I just wanna hold you."Sometimes Nick grows tired of words.





	A Building of The Verse

**Author's Note:**

  * For [woollen_pharaohs](https://archiveofourown.org/users/woollen_pharaohs/gifts).



> For woollen_pharaohs and Ophelia.
> 
> Inspired partially by and title from 'Bodys' by Car Seat Headrest. Implied past angst/relationship turmoil but they're okay!!

There have been countless occasions over the years that have found Nick and Jay in situations like this - Jay hurriedly pulling Nick onto his lap, Nick pressing every inch of his being possible against Jay, seemingly prepared to meld into one. The years have found them in various states when they get here, vulnerable in the wrong ways at times, but they've finally found them trusting themselves and each other enough to let it happen.

Hands grab and pull and press, with one of Nick's finding its way up to cup Jay's cheek while they share a kiss. The other hand, resting on Jay's neck, is soon lifted by Jay's hand. Jay breaks the kiss abruptly, earning a frustrated huff from Nick. He satiates him with one more kiss on the edge of his lips.

Jay brings Nick's hand up between them, both of his hands holding Nick's in front of him. Thumbs work over Nick's soft palm, before coaxing Nick's thin fingers to curl into a loose fist. Jay leans in to place a kiss on one of Nick's paled knuckles, eventually moving on to the next, giving each of the following just as much attentiveness. 

They both still when their eyes meet, Jay's lips still pressing a chaste kiss on skin. The vivid green eyes before Nick speak depths. Nick hopes his eyes say all the right things in return.

Nick pulls one of Jay's hands off of his, instead bringing Jay's palm up to meet his lips. He hides briefly against Jay's palm, pressing his own attentive kisses there. The kisses move up and over the firm but ever-so gentle elevations of Jay's hands, eventually reaching the tips of his fingers and peering over their summit, eyes meeting Jay's again. 

He lets his eyes speak back this time as he takes Jay's index finger between his lips, his plush tongue working over the pad of Jay's finger to make a promise that his lips currently can't. Judging by the warmth rising in Jay's gaze, he knows his message came through clear.

Jay's hands speak well for him, too. In little, subtle ways, Jay shows his reverence-- in the way his hand runs up and down Nick's lithe ribcage, over and over again, seeming to lose count of each overhanging rib and going back again to commit it to memory. In the way Jay's thumb sometimes presses too hard into tender skin while gripping Nick's hips, and Nick often hopes it bruises.

The darkened patches that sometimes litter across his hips remind him that he's adored. Sometimes he needs that, to be adored. To be the sole focus of Jay's attention, to have every inch of him worshiped. It makes him feel gorgeous-- it makes him feel beautiful, handsome, pretty, and any other words that fit his fluid form that day. It makes him feel _right_ , like he's allowed to occupy this body, like he belongs somewhere. He thinks Jay doesn't mind giving him that. He knows Jay understands, at least.

Nick’s more than glad to return the favor, in one way or another. He adores Jay right back, after all. Inside and out, every part of Jay has long drew him in. It's an interesting mix of fascination and comfort. Perhaps a fascination with how someone he's known for so many years can continue to astound and captivate him constantly. 

He shakes himself from his thoughts, slightly dazed from Jay's adoring hands currently skimming up his sides, and returns the favor by letting both his hands fall forward onto Jay's chest. His hands splay over warm skin before skirting over the small nubs under his palms, feeling Jay draw in a breath as Nick's fingernails graze the sensitive skin just enough. Nick's touch tells Jay that he knows what makes him tick, and what flips all of his switches. 

Jay lets his head fall back and arches slightly into the touch, shifting his hips forward just so, enough for Nick's hips to fit just so on his lap. As usual, they fit into place like lock and key.

Their tides ebb naturally as Nick leans forward to wrap his arms around Jay's shoulders. They exhale in near unison before falling into a kiss. One of Jay's hands finds its way to rubbing circles on the small of Nick's back. Their kisses flow comfortably, from affectionate brushes to more intent tugging of lips between teeth, back and forth.

Nick feels Jay's touch start to trace up his back. Fingertips taking their sweet time to trail over each ridge of his spine tell Nick that Jay's caught on Nick’s fragility. Jay's never patronizing - he doesn't treat him like glass, but rather an heirloom he wants to treasure. He never wants to cause Nick harm, and Nick wonders how many times he's hurt Jay. Nick is always aware of the heart Jay wears on his sleeve, no matter how many times he's tried to cover it. It makes Nick briefly recall how many years this boy has occupied his heart. 

He settles Jay's mind by finding Jay's free hand, locking their fingers together and squeezing tightly, assuring him that he still has some strength left in his small form. Soon, Jay's unoccupied hand settles on fanning between Nick's shoulder blades. The gesture feels protective to Nick.

Their kiss breaks apart with a soft sigh from Jay, his eyes remaining closed. Nick can't quite place that sigh. Shortly after, Jay ducks his head and settles it against the crook of Nick's neck, letting his lips ghost over his pulse there. The pieces click together in Nick's mind, and he realizes Jay's worries lie in the impermanence of moments like this-- in the permanence of them, together, Nick translates it as. 

It makes Nick's heart ache. He figures Jay has every right to worry, with how wishy-washy Nick can be at times. He knows he needs to do better, to make up for the tumultuous eras of their lives. He's working on it. In the meantime, he reassures Jay by pulling him closer and placing a kiss atop of his loose curls, resting there until he feels Jay begin to shift.

Jay shifts down slightly to let his lips wander across Nick's collarbone, landing amongst the constellation etched along his left shoulder. Before Nick can fuss too long on his previous train of thought, the gentle press of lips on his tattoo remind him that he was missed. Lips working under his clavicle, then back up and over, finding the hollow alcove above, tell him that Jay missed him immensely. 

Some days, when they're apart for far too long, Nick misses Jay so deeply that the ache settles in his bones. The echo of that hollow feeling no longer rang inside him as Jay worked soft lips up his neck, completing him once again.

Nick moves a hand to card the hair at the base of Jay's neck before finding curls to dig his fingers into. He tugs lightly at them, earning a soft grunt from Jay, and Nick has to bite back a snicker. He pulls Jay's curls again, hoping his message gets across to signal Jay to pull back slightly, and he does this time. Nick uses the brief pause to lean down to place a kiss on Jay's forehead, pouring all his gratitude and apologies and adoration into the simple gesture.

Jay cranes his neck back just enough to meet Nick's gaze again. The gentle fondness in Jay's eyes makes Nick feel something akin to lightheadedness. Jay's smile in response reminds Nick that he is loved.

That's long been something Nick has struggled to express, love. It's either far too much, far too soon, or not enough, too late. He's done it through song before he even had the word placed to describe what he feels for Jay. After what feels like a lifetime, they've reached a place where they can say it and know the other will return it, but sometimes saying it just doesn't seem to do it justice.

Sometimes Nick grows tired of words. Sometimes the only things that do these feelings justice were hot days together and warm nights alone, sharing a thin mattress on hardwood floors. An impromptu, off-the-wall riff that makes laughter perforate the air, the studio's tension now merely an afterthought. A grounding hand to grip while coming down from a bad high. A knee nudging to find another in the dark, closing the already-tight space between them in the back of a tour van. A chest to lean on when the low hits after a bad panic. A wordless kiss on warm skin covered in cosmic-inspired ink, a favorite spot. They knew they made things complicated, but their love is inherently simple, and it's everywhere.

It's a cosmic anomaly that they exist at all, and maybe it's a cosmic anomaly that the two of them came together, too. “Permanence” feels like far too subjective of a word, Nick thinks, but their history has made their roles in each other's lives nearly inescapable. It constantly fluctuates between too much and not enough, but in moments like this, watching fingertips drag down their bellies, lower and lower, a build up for a rewarding chorus, bodies in harmony-- it's just right.

**Author's Note:**

> Please join us in shipping this rarepair thanks I love them


End file.
